Oh february, you have one thing going for you, you are suprisingly short, so payday comes around faster...
the weather is mad in february and every winter seems longer each year...my life is like a big winter oh shut your face rose.
so actually things have been looking up a bit, my contract was extended for another year which i have been dreading not happening. i have applied for an MA which is probably going to be funded too, pretty nice.
my bunnies are quite quiet actually thanks, but nice of you to ask. they are shedding which makes them withdraw somewhat but didn't stop one of them (i have my suspicions who) shitting 1.5 metres up the wall, i didn't know whether to be angry or to give them a round of applause! as it was i was so stunned that i just laughed in admiration.
off to cambridge later, haven't been since xmas, got a hosp appt and then off to see grandma. Uncle tim is living there too at the mo which is going to be slightly mental! however i intend to run across the hills and try and run some tit fat off that dog of grandmas, you know, the one who sings when you play the accordian, fuck mumford and sons and their london folk music, Goldie the dog sings haunting ballads when given the chance, she's suffered alright and her music shows that. although you wouldn't know it now by her grinning face and 10 big tits.
anyway, enough about a dog's tits.
i was trying to clean some of the creeping black mould off my window earlier in the week and it suddenly started to rain REALLY hard, like in a film hard, then that turned to hail, there was a boy walking back from school in the passage beneath and he had his arms outstretched and was nodding his head forwards and backwards and shouting something as if to say 'come ooooonn' he was laughing too, he looked up and saw me and we both laughed, at the hail and at me seeing him and at him getting soaked but not caring, enjoying it, it was pretty sweet.
there's probably a novel in that. 'The creeping mould and the laughing simpleton' or something.
anyway, iam OFF. got a week off woo hoo, having my 3rd wisdom out in March by LOCAL anaesthetic i can't believe i tried to be a hero with that?! what a fool! it's going to be AWFUL!
laters pets
pS how much are you LOVING berlusconi going on trial? he DEF won't get sentenced but that doesn't mean we can't dream!!!
Friday, 18 February 2011
Friday, 11 February 2011
people+journey=bastard life
the annoyance at people on the bus/train/ at the station continues.
i have realised you can divide public transport people into a few simple categories and sub-categories:
1. the socially unaware-
a.people who believe that their journey is more important than anyone elses.
likely characteristics of this are:
talking loudly on a phone, putting their newspaper/briefcase on the seat next to them or just sitting in the aisle and leaving the other seat empty, pushing you out of the way or walking fast and hard and cutting you up really badly-this is especially common at the ticket barrier, fighting with staff if the train is delayed.
b. clueless people-
likely character traits:
Old, teenage, like to stop at the top of a flight of stairs to count their tickets, can't operate the ticket barrier and force a large queue to build (where you are likely to meet character a) stand across the escalator so no one can get past, walk down the stairs very slowly with a dog/bag/ teenagers in a gang ( i have missed a train before just cause of the stair slowness) ask for information at the desk but don't understand the answer, teenagers gang about with lots of mcdonalds bags, usually drinking milkshakes.
On the bus they are likely to ask for complex directions or have lots of trouble finding their bus pass/ change and cause the bus to stop for minutes at a time.
2. the socially aware-
a. Fighters
Likely characteristics:
swear loudly and mutter about anything to do with the train or the bus driver ie 'where the fuck is he going?' they absolutely DON'T want a response to their outbursts, they just want to make sure you can hear them and be more upset than you are. especially common on buses (where yesterday i saw a man confront a driver for changing the ticket roll whilst at a red light, he took a photo of the man and said 'you are putting these people's lives in danger' then when he got off continued arguing and said 'i'll kill you' which made him lose the moral high ground that he was going for, it lasted in all about 3 minutes and was unbearably cringemaking to watch) these people may behave badly, ie smoke, argue into their phone, in order to prompt an argument with another person on the bus/train.
b. Chatters.
Likely characteristics:
male. nearly always men. middle aged, dressed strangely, often with a musty smell, these people want to engage in some banter (led by them) well, they want to talk AT someone as they think that they are wasted and have a lot of stuff to impart on the public seated around them. This usually takes the form of them saying something in response to someone else who is NOT talking to them, when they join in, or else they will talk about weather/delay, but quickly turn it round to them/ where they're from/ what they do/ the old days. you normally feel sorry for them but really want them to shut up, there's normally an element of sexism/racism in their conversation, normally directed at the person nearest them. No amount of ignoring will abate it.
c. Should-know-betters.
Likey characteristics:
Seemingly normal looking women or men, aged 25-45, these people are average people on the street who betray casual bastardly behaviour, if confronted would probably crumble, but may lash out so gauge it well. These are the people who board the empty bus and immediately sit in the disabled seat, staring at the floor or their metro when someone who needs it gets on. they also sit red faced and burning with guilty but righteous silence on the train in their seat while pregnant women/older people stand pressed next to them staring down at them. They never offer to help elderly people off the train, even if they have a huge bag, or ladies with prams even if you give them a death stare and do it yourself.
They are a mystery to all people who were raised well. Basically the kind of people who would find a tenner on the bus, suspect the old lady getting off dropped it, but decide to keep it and tell themselves it is okay.
d. normil
there are normil people who do their best on the train and bus, i never see any, but i know i am one and that most of the people i know are,ok i do see them now and again and i always feel warmth towards them. Even us normils are prone to the odd mutter but mine is always directed at a passenger not the driver.
Final bonus category:
Posh people
-just can't do public transport, their presence in the carridge is distracting and they are likely to do some of the above but mostly their voices drive you mad and they are always on the phone. they also always manage to wangle 2 seats and usually eat something very healthy that looks rank. you end up listening to their myriad of conversations all the way.
laters potaters, i am off to do my daily bus then train journey home, wish me luck :)
ps. the trains are FUCKING expensive and genuinely get shitter day by day so we should be angry about that! my train is on time perhaps 1 day a week but often none, and is delayed by more than 10 minutes 2 or 3 times a week.
i have realised you can divide public transport people into a few simple categories and sub-categories:
1. the socially unaware-
a.people who believe that their journey is more important than anyone elses.
likely characteristics of this are:
talking loudly on a phone, putting their newspaper/briefcase on the seat next to them or just sitting in the aisle and leaving the other seat empty, pushing you out of the way or walking fast and hard and cutting you up really badly-this is especially common at the ticket barrier, fighting with staff if the train is delayed.
b. clueless people-
likely character traits:
Old, teenage, like to stop at the top of a flight of stairs to count their tickets, can't operate the ticket barrier and force a large queue to build (where you are likely to meet character a) stand across the escalator so no one can get past, walk down the stairs very slowly with a dog/bag/ teenagers in a gang ( i have missed a train before just cause of the stair slowness) ask for information at the desk but don't understand the answer, teenagers gang about with lots of mcdonalds bags, usually drinking milkshakes.
On the bus they are likely to ask for complex directions or have lots of trouble finding their bus pass/ change and cause the bus to stop for minutes at a time.
2. the socially aware-
a. Fighters
Likely characteristics:
swear loudly and mutter about anything to do with the train or the bus driver ie 'where the fuck is he going?' they absolutely DON'T want a response to their outbursts, they just want to make sure you can hear them and be more upset than you are. especially common on buses (where yesterday i saw a man confront a driver for changing the ticket roll whilst at a red light, he took a photo of the man and said 'you are putting these people's lives in danger' then when he got off continued arguing and said 'i'll kill you' which made him lose the moral high ground that he was going for, it lasted in all about 3 minutes and was unbearably cringemaking to watch) these people may behave badly, ie smoke, argue into their phone, in order to prompt an argument with another person on the bus/train.
b. Chatters.
Likely characteristics:
male. nearly always men. middle aged, dressed strangely, often with a musty smell, these people want to engage in some banter (led by them) well, they want to talk AT someone as they think that they are wasted and have a lot of stuff to impart on the public seated around them. This usually takes the form of them saying something in response to someone else who is NOT talking to them, when they join in, or else they will talk about weather/delay, but quickly turn it round to them/ where they're from/ what they do/ the old days. you normally feel sorry for them but really want them to shut up, there's normally an element of sexism/racism in their conversation, normally directed at the person nearest them. No amount of ignoring will abate it.
c. Should-know-betters.
Likey characteristics:
Seemingly normal looking women or men, aged 25-45, these people are average people on the street who betray casual bastardly behaviour, if confronted would probably crumble, but may lash out so gauge it well. These are the people who board the empty bus and immediately sit in the disabled seat, staring at the floor or their metro when someone who needs it gets on. they also sit red faced and burning with guilty but righteous silence on the train in their seat while pregnant women/older people stand pressed next to them staring down at them. They never offer to help elderly people off the train, even if they have a huge bag, or ladies with prams even if you give them a death stare and do it yourself.
They are a mystery to all people who were raised well. Basically the kind of people who would find a tenner on the bus, suspect the old lady getting off dropped it, but decide to keep it and tell themselves it is okay.
d. normil
there are normil people who do their best on the train and bus, i never see any, but i know i am one and that most of the people i know are,ok i do see them now and again and i always feel warmth towards them. Even us normils are prone to the odd mutter but mine is always directed at a passenger not the driver.
Final bonus category:
Posh people
-just can't do public transport, their presence in the carridge is distracting and they are likely to do some of the above but mostly their voices drive you mad and they are always on the phone. they also always manage to wangle 2 seats and usually eat something very healthy that looks rank. you end up listening to their myriad of conversations all the way.
laters potaters, i am off to do my daily bus then train journey home, wish me luck :)
ps. the trains are FUCKING expensive and genuinely get shitter day by day so we should be angry about that! my train is on time perhaps 1 day a week but often none, and is delayed by more than 10 minutes 2 or 3 times a week.
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