further info

ok so here's the news you've all been waiting for........

THE REST OF JODIE MARSH'S TATTOOS!!!!

Heat has printed a mini interview with the tattooed maniac and this week it is from the exact other side SO i can inform you of the tats that I was unable to see last week in my expose of her 'MY CRAZY LIFE' arm, here goes...

well, i think i informed you that she inexplicably had a clothes peg tattoo, under that there is an unravelled bar of chocolate, 'neath this is an old fashioned perfume spritzer with a air-pad mechanism, puffing out a cloud into the choc, beneath this, 2 dice (i know, die, i hate that plural and refuse to say it, i also refuse to say cacti, it sound ridic, instead i say 'dice, I KNOW it's die' and cactuses I KNOW it's cacti both of which take longer but whatevvaa)

i guess these dice represent chance? dunno why one has 1 showing and one six? you'd think either 2 6's or snake eyes? they are on a plate as well which is even weirder?

UNDER the dice it simply says, 'life's too short' to remind her, perhaps it should have made her reconsider spending about 300 hours getting these shit tattoo's?

Under 'life's too short' are a pair of pants! they are almost the most ridiculous tattoo although i will save that till later, they edge slightly onto the wrinkle of her elbow as well, right under the pants crotch which looks extra rank.

next to the pants is a silhouette of a woman with huge hair falling to the floor, there's another silhouette which appears to be grabbing the woman's hair? but has no head, it has a huge horses tail too, that's what it looks like anyway, i say what i see...

as we move away from the elbow and up the arm things get a liiiitttle bit stranger... yes, stranger than the TWO wooden clothes pegs that are so representative of her 'crazy life'!!

OK so now we have the token lady in bra and pants that all young ladies get now, as a sign of post-feminism or something, 'look at me,i can accept the truth that men know, i too love sexy women in bra and pants' i suppose it's fair enough for her as this is how she's mad her career, although it isn't her, or it looks nothing like her if it is. The tattoo of the woman has it's OWN tattoo... crazy eh?!

OK now we move over the head of the tattooed tattoo woman and we start to get mega weird, a candle in an old fashioned Mr Scrooge-ish Victorian candle holder? my crazy life eh?! me and my old-fashioned candle holder candle! i'm crazy me! over this, so it looks as though it is perhaps cooking it is a head of BROCCOLI i think this is definitely my favourite tattoo, it's right on her shoulder so if she was wearing any vest or dress you would see just mainly this head of broccoli as the main feature of her shoulder, there to represent her crazy life, slightly under it a bulb of garlic, also doing most of the talking for the crazy life.

Next to the broc we have a chicken, i think it's a cockerel, i don't know if that's the idea; 'cock' or if she has hens or likes chicken, for such an explicit array (see: life's too short) of symbolism i could do with more information around the veg/poultry section of the crazy life map.

FINALLY we're down on the shoulder blade, here we have some dog tags and then we're back to the explicit information again with an exposed human brain wearing a mortar board, if this isn't clear enough there are two shining words with rays emerging from them, one saying "GEEK" the other, "A*" and below the raw brain one saying "BOFF" which actually made me cringe so much that i swallowed my own bottom teeth!

Beneath the 'my crazy life' we have a full-forearm portrait of Michael Jackson, well, we both looked for a while and think it's him, I mean come on, if anyone's face is easy to tattoo on it's MJ, it was tattooed onto HIS Own HEAD for fuck's sake, do that one well at least?!!

that's all for now, enough for a conversation started if you run into her though eh?

"Hey, I hear you have a tattoo of broccoli, I too love broccoli"

or

"hey, I hear you have two wooden clothes pegs tattooed on your arm, what's their significance?"

etc. come on i can't spoonfeed you!